


who are we all fighting for?

by volunteer_of_hufflepuff



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, But also, Critical of the Clave, Fluff, In a way, Introspection, M/M, Utilitarianism, and trump whoops I'm not even American
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-11-28 04:04:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18203273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/volunteer_of_hufflepuff/pseuds/volunteer_of_hufflepuff
Summary: the world spins forward, taking alec with it, to another dreary day, another sacrifice to the greater good.the greater good of whom?Or: Alec lives in a society ruled by utilitarianism, until one day he finds love and peace.That's when he finally discards it.





	who are we all fighting for?

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoy my rant about utilitarianism which delved into this introspection fic which refused to take on the shackles of grammar!
> 
> thanks to [zahrabane](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zahrabane/pseuds/zahrabane) for betaing!

it’s the drop of blood and the sting of steel that keeps alec awake.

fatigue sinks into his bones, unyielding, like the world that pounds at him without mercy every day.

he will never be enough to succeed. only ever enough to try, and even then just until he dies under the splatter of demon vemon.

shadowhunters work for the greatest good for the greatest number.

but who picks up the pieces of the people shattered in that ruthless, utilitarian way?

no one. alec may have a parabatai, but the clave only sees their bond as an aid to their efficiency in battle.

not as a bond that can heal scars.

*

years pass, spiralling to a moment of time when alec won’t feel used, and useless. when he will find someone who is strong, but is sometimes weak, and that is okay.

but back when he lets his knuckles fall to ruins, he can't grasp ‘the greatest good for the greatest number.’

even though it’s a motto drilled into their heads from the day that they are born.

because it doesn’t protect the people it lingers over like a storm, one borne out of warm, crackling air rising with the wrath of the blazing sun.

it takes, and gives nothing in return.

but the world spins forward, taking alec with it, to another dreary day, another sacrifice to the greater good.

the greater good of whom?

the shadowhunters whom it steals from, the downworlders whom it oppresses, mundanes whom it deceives.

that’s what they are never told - whom.

so when alec finally doesn’t live and breathe a toxic culture designed to break him; when he finally feels like he doesn’t have to restrict and cut off parts of who he is to fit the clave’s tidy, neat little box - he forgets.

he forgets that he lives in a world that doesn’t really give a toss about individual’s rights, that concentrates only on the greater good.

isn’t that a communist's greatest dream?

but the thing is, the greater good is made up of many individuals who are thrown away in its name.

so he curls up, next to magnus on a couch they bought together last month, watching the tv flicker on.

the words flash. they spark. they thunder and roll across the screen.

‘make america great again.’

it only serves to remind him of the failings of his society.

magnus mutters under his breath. something about the disgrace of politicians. of the way that men - stupid, powerful men - rise to power, only to bring a whole society tumbling down with their inevitable fall.

it’s sickening that he can protect the mundanes from demons all he wants.

but he can’t save them from a toxic ideology that already permeates his own world with vigour.

he can only live, and live for himself.

to prioritise his, and his loved ones’ - magnus, izzy, jace, maryse, max - happiness.

because, in the end, all civilisations are destined to fall.

*

for it is years later, after the blood has been wiped off his hands and the world lifted from his shoulders, that alec realises that some things aren’t worth the sacrifice.

magnus, and their love, certainly isn’t.

‘the greatest good for the greatest number.’

does that ever lead to anything positive?

or just misery and suffering.

alec doesn’t think so.

dropping nuclear bombs. justified because in the long run, it’ll save more lives, right?

but no one ever thinks of those who are sacrificed in the name of ‘the greater good’.

it’s a slogan so horribly twisted, so misused.

that alec shudders whenever it sparks in his presence.

so it is hope, it is love, it is the happiness he finds within magnus’ presence, that drives him.

not a twisted set of ethics designed to justify the actions of the weak.

for it is through nurture and care of individuals.

that true ‘greater good’ is reached.

_make america make germany make alicante._

alec throws utilitarianism into the trash where it belongs.

and simply loves, and cares, and gives.

because that's how you make the world a better place.

not by shattering the hopes of children.

when alec bleeds now, he wipes the blood from his knuckles and lets his body heal.

because now he's got more to live for than just an undefinable ‘greater good’.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are always appreciated - it's a symbiotic relationship, no?
> 
> [tumblr](https://mirrorofliterature.tumblr.com/).


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